I have to honestly compliment them on how they look or it drives me nuts. So I complimented her, saying she looked really nice today. She just lit up and smiled at that, thanking me. (I know she almost never gets compliments from her husband...something my wife told me...so I try to make a point to compliment her.) I told her that it's just the truth, so no thanks were necessary. She thanked me again and said it was nice to hear that once in a while. Picking up on her hint that she doesn't get. Alice's eyes widened, though, and she looked unsure."No worries, Cousin. I looked at the menu beforehand — order without fear." I can't drink, yet, so I am not going to guzzle expensive wine. This is only the third time I've been to this place, and the first that I looked at the prices. I hope you are not making a bigger deal out of this than it has to be?" If you think I want to impress the panties off you, Cousin Alice, you are correct."She was surprised enough to bark a laugh, immediately. Still, it kept perfect time and I got to mom's place at the exact right moment.You never saw less of a welcome than the one that I got at the door. Mom and her sister were there, wearing only bathrobes. On the coffee table were four glasses, a half empty bottle of Jack, a six pack of Bud, and three cigars. My beautiful mom spoke in a slow, slurred tone; she normally spoke in a crisp, genteel, ice cold fashion. Slightly drunk, she actually sounded, dare I say, like a tramp.I sort of barged in,. I had wised up and realized that shopping for woman's clothes with a wedding ring on was really not a big head turner in a store, even if a sales person asked if I needed help I could always use a cover story about an impending birthday or such. I began to gather up a fairly decent assortment of clothes in a container I kept in the shed. When ever I could I would sneak out and slip on something for a few minutes but I never had time to dress fully. My wife soon began to take the k**s to her.
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